Like You Mean It
Sharon December 30th, 2008
I have been very fortunate in the response that I’ve gotten to my writings. After all, you can pretty much sum up my analysis as “you are going to have to live a radically different life than you are now, let’s get at it.” You’d think that I’d get a lot of shit for it – and I do get some, of course. But for the most part, people are extremely nice about the fact that I am telling them something that isn’t a lot of fun to hear.
Now many of the people who are kindest and most supportive of my work, are also people, who, to be blunt, have absolutely no intention of making radical changes in their lifestyle. It is quite common for me to hear someone tell me just how much they love my work, and for it to become absolutely clear in our conversation that while they may well believe in some ways that lives may change, that I may have a point, at a fundamental and deep level they know that they will not be one of those people struggling, and that their ecological impact and choices are perfectly reasonable, and that there is no reason whatsoever to discuss them.
Now I am a normal person, and perfectly capable of hanging out with people who respect my work but don’t necessarily agree with everything I say, or who aren’t ready to implement my ideas. Everything takes time, and people come to ideas in their own ways. But I admit, it worries me. I recognize that there isn’t much I can do about the people who outright reject my thinking, or think I’m a complete whack-job, but I find myself genuinely concerned by people who cannot fully imagine themselves among those who need to grow food to eat, or really unemployed and without a safety net.
Don’t get me wrong – I think some people will be ok, and that some people are acting from perfectly reasonable assumptions. At the same time, I think it is worth noting how rapidly we are watching institutions and people who we once were sure were completely secure simply fall apart – Bernie Madoff ‘fesses up, and one day there are a bunch of old ladies who are pretty much destitute. One day we are certain that nothing could bring down X or Y business or bank – only to find that six months later, it is in the process of vanishing without a trace. The fact is, our sense of security as it exists now can be undermined rapidly – and the time to prepare for such an evaporation is when it seems barely possible, not after it has happened.
I get nervous when people email me and say that they know that they are secure because they work as a teacher or for X or Y business. They may be right, of course, but it seems increasingly like that states and municipalities may not be able to pay the bills, or that businesses that seemed recession proof, aren’t. I worry when people tell me that they feel like their investments are probably ok, because we’re near a bottom, or when they say they are sure their house will still sell, or that if they just refinance at the new low, they’ll be ok. I don’t argue – I might well be wrong, after all, but it worries me.
And because of that worry, I’m just going to ask this. As you go through and make your resolutions to be a better person next year, consider this one. Resolve to spend five minutes a week asking “what if I actually had to not just say Sharon might be right, but act it, live life like I meant it?” You can still think that I’m a little over the edge, I don’t mind, heck you can even praise me less and complain about me more for making demands of you. But I admit, I’d sleep better knowing that you’d covered yourself, just in case. Because somehow the strange scenarios don’t seem quite as strange any more.
I don’t mind if you think I’m crazy – in fact, I’m fine with that. But if there’s a little part of you that thinks that just possibly I might not be, try, for a bit, to live it like you mean it. I’ll let you yell at me later if I wasted your time, promise 
.
Sharon
- future
- Comments(67)
Living like you mean it has taken on a whole new meaning for me. On Sunday afternoon, the baseboard radiators in my unit stopped working. Still had electricity and water though. The other two units were fine and over the course of the last three days its been determined there’s a frozen section in my unit. I’ve made do with a couple of space heaters which would keep the place somewhere between 42 and 52 degrees (depending on whether I had one or two on at a time). I’d been keeping the temperature set at 50 when not home or sleeping and 60 when I’m home and awake for more than two hours. What I found was that putting on an extra layer was all that was necessary.
It got even more exciting yesterday. In the course of repairing a leaky toilet, my landlord and his son-in-law shut off the water only to find that the valve had broken while closed when they were finished. Now we have no running water. I could kick myself for not filling up the various 5 gallon vessels I have for water storage but the landlord and I went to my workplace and filled up a couple 5 gallon jugs. I have two 5 gallon buckets with spigots so one is potable and the other is nonpotable. Since I only flush the toilet once a day, I used gray water from washing dishes and my hands a few times this morning. I think I’ve used less than two gallons of water since yesterday evening. My landlord’s comment was that if he had to carry water in all the time, flush toilets would stop being used very quickly. He reads this blog on occasion, wonder what made him think that?
Oh and did I mention that the temperature here for the last week has been between -10 and 0 degrees F?
I’ll freely admit I’m now one of the choir but wasn’t when I started reading this blog almost two years ago. I was one of those people who agreed but didn’t see a need to change the way I lived. But little by little I’ve made changes. The more I read this blog the more changes I make. So now when I have no heater and no running water and it’s mucking cold outside, I’m barely discomfited. For all that I now feel that I’m not doing enough, I see that when push comes to shove I’ve learned how to make do. My point is that people can change their minds and their lifestyles even if their initial reaction is “oh, no, not me!”
Sharon, you’re a signal light in the perfect storm. That light will still be there when more lives become capsized. They might agree and not act now, but at least they know where to turn when they must act. Thank you for being a nag and not shutting up.
May continued strength and courage be yours as the new year dawns,
Kerri in AK
I only found your blog a few weeks ago, but I am already trying to make some changes. So far? I’ve bought a few extra cans of tomatoes and beans and an extra large jar of peanut butter for emergencies, but it’s a start.
This year, my husband and I plan to buy our first home, and I hope to keep reading and keep learning from you how to be an urban homesteader (until they come up with a better term!) and live my life like I mean it. Prepared.
Thanks Sharon for all of the time and work you put into this. I really appreciate it. I’m happy to know that there are others that are looking at things the way I do.
My family is living proof that no one has a “safe” job. I thought the same thing for my dad working as a Director at a Health Dept. in Illinois. The problem with state money is everywhere and that is what caused his lay off this week. When someone is paid through grant funding, and the funding is coming up short..well, guess who loses their job. There were a whole slew of people laid off that were part of the Head Start preschool program also. I think this may be only the beginning, sadly.
Hiya Sharon,
Your blog is priceless. THANKS!
For those of us who live “small is beautiful” lifestyles and have for some years, it’s a matter of doing what we want. Our carbon footprint is smaller than 25% of average USA. We just need to finally get the composting toilet built and install the solar water heater, add to the garden, store more food.
We don’t live like this out of guilt, fear, inadequate resources or lack of education. We live happy fulfilled lives w/o all the stuff. We have no kids, no big house (the small house we built is paid for), no debt, no soul-sucking jobs. We do have an old small fuel efficient car, several bikes, many friends, big family, close community, meaningful work, political activism, etc. We have the time to be ourselves.
Ignoring mainstream criticism isn’t as tough as putting up with mind & spirit deadening jobs, adhering to foolish fashion, living wasteful, unfulfilled lives, being miserable.
The rest of the consuming world will catch on. Or not.
Sing, dance, enjoy life in connection w/earth. Its not about doing without, its about getting to do what you want that actually makes sense.
edde
I go in cycles – last year, around this time, I started putting away a year’s worth of dry goods. (I love having the co-op bulk section in the house!) I made lists, bought hand-crank lanterns, replaced the burned-out fireplace with an efficient fireplace insert, etc. The first round of “easy” things is done. The harder things – learning how to cook in a fireplace (that isn’t really designed for it), the sheer physical labor of cutting wood – those are more daunting.
And I’m tired. Tired and heartsick. I want it all to not be true. The crisis is well under way, and we’re not feeling much direct impact yet, and the temptation is to retreat into the hope that “maybe it just won’t get that bad.”
I need balance between having my head in the sand, and fear-driven preparedness that threatens to turn into depression. I *need* hope. It makes a huge difference to have it again…but I also know I need to not let hope be my only armor.
I’ve given myself permission to take the holidays off. Then I’ll try to pick up a reasonable (non-depressive) chunk and try one more time to make an edible dinner on my fireplace’s warming mantle.
Sharon – Go ahead and pick on me, I don’t expect you to treat me any differently regarding my life’s circumstances.
Anyhoo, maybe I’ve misinterpreted what you meant here, but I was basing my comments on a few things you say in this post as well as other things discussed on your blog, particularly your predictions for 2009.
The following statement led me to believe that you were referring to a sort of fast crash, where things get dire very quickly and with little warning:
“At the same time, I think it is worth noting how rapidly we are watching institutions and people who we once were sure were completely secure simply fall apart – Bernie Madoff ‘fesses up, and one day there are a bunch of old ladies who are pretty much destitute … The fact is, our sense of security as it exists now can be undermined rapidly – and the time to prepare for such an evaporation is when it seems barely possible, not after it has happened.”
Under these circumstances, it would be difficult to recover, no matter how well you’ve prepared your homestead unless you are mostly debt free. So, let’s assume for a moment that we aren’t debt free. What sort of preparation are you referring to here that would help out in these circumstances? Nothing I do now will affect me from renting out my basement to another family if I did lose my job, yet it’s unlikely that their rent will cover my $3600 mortgage. What I’m assuming, based on your posts, is that (as you said in your predictions) up to a million jobs will be lost per month. I wouldn’t expect, under these circumstances, to find anything paying remotely what I’m earning now that would be able to cover expenses.
Why not react “after it has happened”? That’s what I would do – try to find renters to cover the cost and other things you suggested. But all those suggestions would occur after the fact.
So, what could I possibly do now to insulate myself short of moving out to a cheaper area that has land? I am in no way suggesting there is no in-between from expensive home to trailer-park, but when you live in an over-priced urban area with a LOT of suburban sprawl, you have to move pretty far out in order to get something affordable with enough land to live off of. And then you still need to work to pay for it. The issue here is indebtedness and a place to live/space to subsist.
I’m already growing a lot of food, but not nearly enough to survive on (but could grow a hell of a lot more if need be). I’m already storing food, but not nearly enough to outlast really any major interruption in the food supply. I’m willing to take in a dozen boarders if that will help with expenses and I’m probably more capable than most to manage my family in securing water and managing without electricity if there are issues with that. But, if I don’t have a house to do all these things in, and little money (or the dollar is devalued substantially) to do it with, all the rest is really just an exercise, or a hobby.
And, perhaps I just really don’t know what you meant by “living like you mean it”. What are you suggesting we do now outside of what I’m already doing?
My DH and I have been living more simply since 1994, doing a little more each year. We aren’t all the way to where I’d like to be, but it’s already apparent that the changes we’ve made have paid off in a major way. We’ve weathered days-long electrical outages, have reduced our use of electricity by 39% and our natural gas usage by 66% in 2007 compared to our 1990 usage (I used 1990 as the base year because of the Kyoto protocol), and we can live on an income that is so low we don’t owe any federal income tax.
I appreciate your web site and book. It helps me think of the next steps and prioritize them. In 2009 I’d like to glass in the south-facing front porch for a sunspace and small greenhouse. I’d also like to set up a filter for rain water like the one described in a recent issue of Permaculture Activist. Then we could drink that instead of city water. I keep mulling over the winter-heat issue and whether or not we should consider a wood stove for the basement. If we have that much extra money at some point, I’d consider it more seriously.
I totally agree, you don’t need to move to the country to make good preparations for simpler living. We were doing it on a 1/8 acre inner-ring suburb lot with a 200 square foot veggie garden for the first seven years. Since 2002 we’ve had a 1 acre lot in another inner-ring suburb, about 10 miles from the Arch. We got it only because I got serious about raising food, and the suburb we live in is undervalued because of being in the inner ring so we could afford to pay cash for the house and land. Now we have fruit and nut shrubs and trees, a much larger garden for annual vegetables, and a separate garden with perennial veggies. I don’t plan to get animals, but my DH grows culinary mushrooms, which are a whole lot easier and from what I can tell, a satisfactory substitute for animal protein. But it’s not even necessary to garden, if you hate it … if I understand Sharon and others, what is best is to think of what you could do to contribute to your own and others’ well-being in a low-energy world, and do that. For me it’s gardening. For someone else it could be playing music, or knowing how to repair bicycles, or fixing houses to use less energy, or mediating conflicts, or any of the other things we’ll be depending on each other for in a low-energy future.
The thing that I worry about is none of my siblings and few of my friends have any idea that things could change, already are changing, very drastically. I don’t know how to even begin to bring it up, especially with my brothers, who are high up in the corporate world and thus totally invested in a continual growth economy. The best I can hope for is to have some strategies to share when things hit them personally. Maybe I’ll find something in this blog that will help me with that. In the meantime, happy 2009 and thanks for all you do!
You know, I have stewed about this all day. In my previous post I made it sound like I am doing nothing, but upon reflection that is not true. We are not buying a new car eventhough we have two older paid off cars and people say – buy a new one!. We eat a lot of scratch food and no meat. I have started thinking about purchases in a different way – no stuff that I don’t need. And the needs have changed from useless stuff to down comforters I saw on sale. We live in a small house that is way below our means. Even this little change of thinking will help – lead to bigger things. This afternoon I started to plan for a garden and to look at seeds online. I can do this – THANKS for the push. I think the next step is to have an honest talk with my husband – maybe give him your book to read!
Thanks!
elle
I think there’s a little hubris in this for Sharon, expecting her own words to change the world overnight. That never happens. New ideas just sort of ooze into the world, things change slowly.
I mean, in 1954 less than half of Americans favoured integrating streetcars and buses. Then in 1970 88% of them favoured it. [source]. What changed? People just went ahead and integrated them, did their own thing – and people said, “hey, that’s not so bad after all.” Over 16 years, the idea of integration just became accepted.
So even when people seem to be unaffected by your writing and these urgent ideas, well in time they’ll change. But if Sharon had to wait 16 years she’d probably explode.
I think Sharon is falling into what is fancily called “the fallacy of the excluded middle.”
“I’m against capital punishment.”
“What? So we should just let them all go?!”
“I’m in favour of capital punishment.”
“What? So we should execute people for jaywalking?!”
There’s a whole middle ground of possible ways to do things which is excluded by those extreme statements. Just because we’re not all in the country raising our own goats doesn’t mean we’re not making useful changes.
Plus there’s psychological preparation, which is the most important thing. Someone with some survival or first aid training, however long ago it was, and no equipment, this person will do better in a crisis situation – anything from car accident to a hurricane wiping out a city – than someone with no training and a whole ambulance or bunker worth of stuff. That’s because people who never expected or trained for trouble tend to panic and do nothing, which never helps. But people with some training get their arses moving and improvise.
So writing like this, even if it doesn’t motivate action, it helps people be psychologically prepared for trouble. And that’s the most important thing of all.
Sharon & all,
Almost finished your book, & enjoyed it tremendously. Since it’s just my wife and I who are near retirement, we are staying put and putting up solar panels for electricity. (Yeah I know you disagree, but we already have the triple insulated windows, a fireplace, a pile of hand tools for woodworking, and 7 raised bed gardens & two fruit tress with more to come.) Rain barrels check. Take the train to work check. Live near a shore for fishng check. Joining the local garden club to get a community garden and support CSA check. Trying to be the community resource is what we are trying to do. I know people get tired of hearing about PO and CC, but eventually it gets through. One of my nieces just told me her boyfriend is the only person who talks about PO beside me. It’s a start. Now we just have to work faster and harder. Happy New Year!
Perhaps what you are hearing is not a rejection of your analysis of the problem, but a rejection of your solutions. Some people may be in a position that they are already as prepared as they want to be. That’s me, at least.
We’ve built our emergency fund to be 1 year of our salary, which could be stretched to probably 1.5 years of expenses. It is in a savings account at a different bank than our mortgage or our checking accounts. Now, if these 3 banks AND FDIC collapses I admit that we are screwed. But that’s a level of risk I’m willing to assume.
And I’ll second the arguments that many people make about how many of the strategies you advocate take a lot of time. If you are working fulltime (or more) it is difficult to carve out time for starting a new income stream or growing your own food. In some ways I think you are ignoring some of the advantages you have. You don’t have a job outside the home, your husband works for the school system (which includes more frequent & much longer breaks than most jobs), and you’ve been at this for a lot longer.
I’m not saying it is easy for you to make the changes you have made. But there are 2 sides to every coin – hard work AND opportunity. You are fortunate, you have advantages that others do not. You also have challenges like a special needs child & religious dietary restrictions. I have different advantages and challenges. I leave for work & come home when it is still dark outside. I travel for 2 or 3 weeks at a time which makes gardening a challenge. But I am lucky in that I make a good salary & our only debt is our home. Your reserves are the ability to grow your own food, my reserves are a very small garden and a substantial savings account.
Crunchy, you just really put things in perspective for me. Our mortgage–and we live in a small city one hour north of Minneapolis/St. Paul so not the total boonies–is $750/month. And I thought that was too much! Of course, we are able to live well on a teacher’s salary of $50k a year. I would encourage anyone who is able to move to smaller cities and towns that are a good fit for you. The cost of living is so much more reasonable. And that’s why we live and work here instead of in Mpls./St. Paul, where a 1900 sq. foot home similar to ours would cost 2-3 times as much (still way less than yours, though, wow!). I guess perspective makes me appreciate even more that we were able to make the somewhat simple living choices we’ve made.
Sharon, you should know you’ve inspired radical changes in a lot of people’s lives. I have to say, you sound a little full of yourself in expecting more, and from all your readers…Sorry! (coming from someone who very much appreciates your work)
I like the way Sharon puts it: “Resolve to spend five minutes a week asking ‘what if I actually had to not just say Sharon might be right, but act it….’ ”
For us, that means thinking of ways to “adapt in place”, as she puts it. We’ve become block captains in the neighborhood crime watch, in an effort to get to know neighbors better. We’re resolving to watch the spending and keep our house well insulated and able to cope without electricity if need be. Learning to grow a bit of food and cook from scratch. But not out of anxiety for what Peak Oil might bring.
Nobody knows what tomorrow will bring. I could get hit by a bus, the planet could get creamed by a giant asteroid. Who knows! Our lives are fragile and no amount of preparation can prevent suffering and hardship. I think maybe the trick to life is to find pleasure and joy in the small things. To live intentionally in that respect.
Wow! I’m kind of surprised by a lot of the comments. *shrug* Personally, I was inspired by this particular blog post to set some specific goals for the coming year. I DEFINITELY fall into the category of “yeah, that sounds good … for those OTHER people; here’s the LONG list of why I can’t do it.” Not proud of that, but there it is. So, I am officially declaring 2009 the year of “Elizabeth Lives Like She Means It!”
- As soon as I finish writing this, I’ll be analyzing my electric usage for the last year; I’ve set a goal to reduce whatever that amount is by 1/3. Not RIOT levels, but it’s a start.
- I’m going to quit *talking about* gardening, and actually *do the work of* gardening. We have a long growing season here, and there’s absolutely no reason I can’t be growing things RIGHT NOW.
I have a very long list and won’t bore you all with its entirety. LOL Just want to thank you, Sharon, for lighting a fire under me. I’ve been approaching 2009 with trepidation; now, I’m just excited!
It’s taken me just under an hour to read and digest all the comments to this blog post. I’m physically, and emotionally, exhausted! I’m amazed at the variety of responses, ideas and attitudes. One thing I noticed is an almost total lack of discussion of what happens to us, regardless of our degree of preparation, when the civic order disintegrates. How do we contend with the fact that the vast majority of our “neighbors” aren’t doing any preparation or making even the most modest efforts toward it. Most of the entries I read here are from people who have at least a basic understanding of what needs to be done and are taking positive steps. The fact is, the vast majority of people, not just in the US but everywhere, are living in denial and are clueless.
Many of these people will be willing, and prepared, to simply take what they’ve been unable get for themselves. When starvation becomes commonplace in the general populace, how will we protect out food stores? Will we have to stand guard over our gardens to protect against those that approach with plunder in mind? Will we be confronted with the possibility of using deadly force against our desperate neighbors?
I’d like to think things won’t collapse to that degree, that we’ll all be able to come together and cooperate in sustaining what will undoubtedly be a vastly simpler life, that we’ll all behave rationally for the “common Good”, that those of that have will willingly share with those that don’t. Any more, I think that’s just a pipe dream. It could have happened, voluntarily, 25 or 30 years ago. When the bottom truely falls out, I think it more likely it will be everyone for themselves in the chaos.
We may end up with a society like that depicted in Jim Kunstler’s book “World Made By Hand”, but getting from here to there will involve a process I hope I don’t live to see. Kunstler’s stark but romanticized vision of life post-oil, post-pretty- much-everything has its appealing aspects doesn’t touch much on the horrifying changes on our not-too-distand horizon.
I’ve made some, but not enough, preparation myself. I’ve stored food and water, but only have space for a rudimentary garden. A year before I retired in 2006, I traded a large, falling-apart older home, for a 900 sq ft earth sheltered home. It has a nice southern exposure, and I’ve discovered that, sans water, I don’t need gas or electric…the interior temp never seems to go below 64 degrees without heat, even in low-teen outside temps. I can cook on a solar oven and have planned a diet that isn’t dependent on refrigeration. I have a couple of solar powered “gadgets” (flashlight, lantern, battery charger, radio, camp shower, water purifier) and a small but growing array of strictly survival tools.
So, I think I can live fairly well for 6 months or so, and survive much more primitive circumstances for a bit longer. If, and it’s a big IF at this time, civil society can hold together. About this prospect, I have an increasingly dim view. I find it strange that a lifelong pacifist has recently acquired a fairly impressive arsenal and lots of amunition, although I think I’d find it hard to “draw down on” someone who was simply hungry and wanting food, as opposed to a violent attacker. But who’s to say they might not be one in the same? It’s a moral dilemna that I don’t know if I could face. I live in a rural, gun-totin’ place and expect many others here might not have the same qualms.
I admit I’m afraid much of the time…not to the point of paralysis or panic, but most definitely leery of what’s to come. I guess I’m afraid more for my three kids and theirs, as they seem to unaware of things, or simply in a state of cognitive dissonance about it all. A future such as can be imagined is, after all, not a pleasant thing to think about. I’ve a lot of gentle teaching and urging to no apparent avail Perhaps I was too gentle? Anyway, as things are, I don’t believe they’ll fare well, unless we all get very lucky.
Now I’m really depressed! I haven’t intended to to sound too grim, or to lecture. But I do wonder why the subject of violent confrontation isn’t more often discussed among the “gentle survivalists”? Thoughts please?
Thanks, Sharon, for your instructive, and inspiring writings!
PS: Why did this thread stop abruptly on Jan 1? I though y’all were just getting cranked up!
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