Goldman Sachs Isn’t a Vampire Squid…

Sharon July 29th, 2009

…it is much, much more sinister.  At least according to Bloomberg’s very funny Michael Lewis.

“Rumor No. 5: Goldman Sachs is “a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming its blood funnel into anything that smells like money.”

Those words are of course taken from a recent issue of Rolling Stone magazine and they are transparently false.

For starters, the vampire squid doesn’t feed on human flesh. Ergo, no vampire squid would ever wrap itself around the face of humanity, except by accident. And nothing that happens at Goldman Sachs — nothing that Goldman Sachs thinks, nothing that Goldman Sachs feels, nothing that Goldman Sachs does –ever happens by accident.”

The best I could muster way back in October was a vision of Paulson and Bernanke, in preparation for erotic release, drinking and singing “And no one’s getting fat except Goldman Sachs.”  I swear, I was trying to be funny, not making serious predictions.  Uh-oh.


One Response to “Goldman Sachs Isn’t a Vampire Squid…”

  1. ceceliaon 29 Jul 2009 at 12:55 pm

    that was hysterical - in a sick sort of way - my fav line - America stands at a crossroads, and Goldman Sachs now owns both of them.

    The ability to laugh is essential at times like these.

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